Just a week ago it dawned on me that it has been 6 months since one of the longest, hardest days of our lives. Six months since Sutton's first surgery (and 6 months today since his second surgery). We've been on this path of re-teaching him to eat and drink and it has felt SO long and tedious, but it's only been 6 months. Sutton is still taking all food by mouth and about half of his liquids. We didn't have to fight an oral aversion, despite him having every reason to be, and he's as motivated as ever. Gratitude.
As Kedric was getting ready for work this morning and I was feeding Isaac, I commented how big he was for a 4.5 week old. Then I realized, we were just being discharged from the NICU at this stage in Sutton's life. Sutton was still at birth weight; he seemed so little and fragile. I was scared to bring him home. We had refused around the clock monitoring, but he had a large mass pressing on his airway. With Isaac, I don't have any of these concerns. He's a little congested, but we're not making a Christmas trip to the ER like we did with Sutton last year for the same thing. Gratitude.
When I have quiet little moments like this to reflect at the path God has set before us, I have more gratitude than ever before. That space used to be filled with turmoil, fear and anxiety. I used to wonder "why my baby?" and "why our family?". I do still wonder those same things some times, but now I ask those questions with thanks and wonder instead of anger and hurt.
My, what a difference a year (or two) makes.
The happiest of holiday seasons, from our family to yours!
Photo by Stella Studios
No comments:
Post a Comment